After tt horrifying weekend, i was really in a totally stone and bad mood on monday.. i kept myself busy doing all sorts of things.. i went home n pig through the night cos i figured it would be the best thing to do anyway..

tuesday was much better after the long slp.. after work i met up wif rh, cindy, agnes, wee, spencer and jianling to holland v..

i stil tot i would be able to meet dear on wed.. but he's tired.. ok.. i really tried to understand his situation, which i did.. so i went home.. i tot about everything.. i guess i am the only person who can be there for myself if i need any help or any comfort.. sometimes i feel i need to treat myself a little more better.. why do i always think about others first.. why i can sacrifice slp time just to see him.. i think i am really being so stupid.. i really need to think more for myself.. it might sounds selfish.. but there's the way life is isnt it? blah!

yesterday i meet him for dinner.. then we went over to meet up with spencer, rh and wee.. i think next time i shall go alone to meet them instead.. he seems so bored.. cant even sit still to listen wat they saying like last time.. mayb cindy was right.. mayb all of them were right.. he really changed le.. i dont know how to say how he's changed.. i feel so disheartened.. i just dont wish to say anymore.. so i kept quiet..